Letting Go - not one of my strengths

May 30 - React to this term:  Letting go

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. ~Helen Keller

Letting go - the very words bring a heaviness to my heart.  I am not good at letting go.  I cling to the familiar and the beloved, whether it is a tradition, a period of time, a location, or a memory.  I am not so much attached to objects as to experiences, and even when it is something I look forward to, such as a different summer schedule like this year where I will have more time to spend in NH it is hard for me to let go of the pattern of the past 10 summers.  Once I made the decision to leave in June I immediately experienced the anxiety I get from change - but I am trying to let go of it.  I am very excited to spend more time in NH especially since my own family will be there more this year, but I will still be anxious about leaving John and my garden and my NC pool days behind for so long.  During the transitional times in my life - graduations, beginning new jobs, getting married, moving, I am often plagued by nightmares of "end of the world", fantastical dreams of lava spewing, earth upheaving, flooding and doom.  This is how my subconscious reacts to letting go!  

Let go. Why do you cling to pain? There is nothing you can do about the wrongs of yesterday. It is not yours to judge. Why hold on to the very thing which keeps you from hope and love? ~Leo Buscaglia

Letting go - I wish I was better at letting go of painful memories.  My memory is very strong, with vivid memories even back from before I could talk.  Is there a method to use to let go of the negative memories?  My husband can tell you that I never forget a hurtful comment . . . and it sometimes makes me reluctant to take a chance, especially with my heart.  Even memories that aren't really mine can affect me.  I almost did not adopt my sweet little spitfire dog because I was afraid that looking at her cut-off ears would remind me that she had been abused and that it would be too big a burden on my heart.  But the encouragement of friends and family helped me let go of that fear, and I have her here with me.

Letting go - as a teacher I have to let go of my class of children every year at this time, and send them all off to other schools.  It is a good example of something that even though it can feel hard at the time is really a positive and exciting thing.  At the end of the year we make little scrap books for the kids of photos and mementos and making the books gives me a chance to look back through the year with each child, and then to send them out.  Maybe I can use this blog as my scrapbook, going back over the special times, and then try to mentally send myself on into the future, into the unknown, and not look back so much.

Music to My Ears - and Heart

1.I have not forgotten that I skipped yesterday's assignment which was all photos, so will have to catch up on that.

Today's assignment is 5 songs or pieces of music that speak to you or bring back memories.

How to pick only 5??



1.  The 12th of Never - Donny Osmond version.  This was my FAVORITE song for so many years when I was young and so in love with Donny, and convinced if only we could meet he would feel the same way . . .
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EOHBpqHhLTE

2. You Are So Beautiful to Me
So simple and a bit corny yes, but when John and I were going out and it came on the radio he would sing it to me . . .  and really make me feel like I was beautiful to him . . . .
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spsVigJCvNU

3. The Believe in Yourself Song - I can't find it on either youtube or grooveshark, but this brings back such memories.  Caitlin came home from kindergarten saying it was her class' "theme song", and she loved it so much I found a copy of it.  We would play whenever someone had something hard to do, like a big swim meet or soccer game or tryouts, it was very motivational!  Of course the kids outgrew it at some point, and would get mad or roll their eyes if I mentioned it or sang it, but I still have very fond memories of it and of the power of it, and luckily for me I can pass it on to my class!  A few years ago a little girl in my class impressed her father by climbing a difficult tree and when her dad said "wow how did you do that?"  she replied matter of factly "I just believed in myself.  Miss Vicky taught me".  It is a powerful song and one that children can really learn from.  The idea of it being ok to not succeed at first, but to keep trying is something most kids need to be taught. Since I don't have a link, here are the lyrics -

When there's a dream inside your heart, don't be afraid
Cause you can start to make your dreams come true
When you believe in yourself

Believe you can do most anything
Give it your best and you can start to make those dreams come true
When you believe in yourself

When you find your heart's desire
You must give your whole heart to it
And if at first you don't succeed
Keep trying till you do it!

So make a wish and give it your all
Pick yourself up when you stumble and fall
Keep trying till you're through
Believe in your self, believe in yourself
Believe in yourself and you'll make those dreams come true!


4. I also LOVE Taylor Swift's song, The Best Day.  She really captures the relationship she has with her parents at different ages in a way very familiar to most parents I'm sure.  Plus it is just so cool that she recognized at such a young age how lucky she was to have her parents.  And it reminds me of how lucky I have been to have my family!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4_6eQm7RTQ


5. Sheep May Safely Graze - by Bach
I love Bach, and think this is simply a beautiful piece.  It is also connected with some memories for me.  It figures in one of my very favorite young adult books,  I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith.  I loved how the narrator described her previous experience with Bach like being hit repeatedly over the head with a spoon (maybe she was trying to play the Two Part Inventions?) but then heard this piece and of course changed her opinion of Bach.
This song was also a traditional piece played at the Christmas Eve Service at the Plymouth Congregational Church.  It has been 17 years since I was a member of the church and the choir and I still miss it and miss the beautiful music of that service.

So those are the 5 I would pick today - but stay tuned, I may change it tomorrow!

From Me to You - a letter to my readers

Day 27, Monday: A letter to your readers

Dear Readers,

Thank you for coming here to read my blog.  I especially want to thank those of you to whom I am related in some way as you come  here motivated, I believe, by love and support for me, and therefore to my writing.  I don't know if I am worthy of your time but please know that I appreciate it.  I often tell myself I am writing for myself, and I know that I would write even if I  knew no one would ever read any of the words I type, but knowing that there are actually people out there reading helps me stretch myself a bit farther and try really hard not to skip a day or cheat on the assignment.  You should know that I am elated when I a comment by a reader, and consider your remarks thoughtfully.  I will try to continue with the blog even after the month of May, though most likely not on a daily basis.  I feel like that will eventually wear out even my closest relatives!  If anyone has an idea of a topic they would like me to write about I would be glad to hear it as I may set my own topics for the weeks of June and July.

But for now, thank you all so much for reading me, and helping me to set up a habit of writing.  I know it has been beneficial for me, and hope that in some way, at some point it will be beneficial for you as well.

Sincerely,

Me

What 5 year olds should be learning . . .

Day 26, Sunday: Something you read online. Leave a link and discuss, if you'd like.

http://www.naeyc.org/files/yc/file/200803/BTJ_Primary_Interest.pdf

"Developing Self Regulation in Kindergarten-Can We Keep All The Crickets in the Basket?"

If everyone understood how important it is for all children to learn self regulation skills like controlling impulses, following directions, doing things you should do even if you don't want to do, etc. , and if all children had the opportunity to learn it we would all be better off.  This is what young children should be learning before we stress academics, and this is why I am glad I teach in a private school where I can teach what is really important and not stress out over making 5 year olds read.

Nobody's perfect

Day 25, Saturday: Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget (good or bad)

I always felt like my dad was in my corner.  When I was really little, maybe 4 or 5 I remember him driving me down to the lake for swim lessons but as soon as we got there I freaked out and was so afraid, and he just took me home without getting angry, and taught me how to swim on our own.  My dad was the one who understood how much I wanted a horse when I was young, and gave me permission to buy one (much to my mom's chagrin).  My dad was the one who first took an interest in my writing, having an essay that I wrote when I was in 5th grade published in an Episcopal newsletter, and he made me feel like I could be a good writer.  He  even took me and a bunch of my friends to an Osmond concert back in the day when Donny was my true love. When I was struggling with things as a teenager it was my dad that I went to for help.  

I believe my sister had similar feelings.  Plus my dad was the one who encouraged her to paint and gave her watercolor lessons when she was quite young.  She became an artist, and as adults when we were all together she and my dad would have these long discussions about her art, and art in general.  This was when my kids were pretty young and I was going through a difficult phase in my marriage and was on medication for postpartum depression after having my third child.  I had lost a lot of weight before that pregnancy but on that medication I gained about 25 pounds. Well I remember one day when we were visiting at my parents, and he had had some of those conversations with my sister and though I understood their connection with art I was a bit jealous of their conversations together and the attention she was getting from him.   So imagine how excited I was when once my youngest was napping he called me into the living room saying he wanted to talk to me about something.  I was so excited and eager to have his attention!  And then he began - " are you aware that you have been putting on quite a bit of weight lately?"  I was totally crushed.  THAT was what he wanted to talk about with me?? My mind just shut down and I have no idea what else he said, but that was devastating to me, and still makes me tear up to remember it.  I know he was concerned about my health, but all I could feel was that he couldn't see me beyond my physical appearance and was ashamed of how I looked.  I was so not expecting that!  And of course I was aware!  I already felt awful about gaining the weight, and helpless to stop it too.  I wish I could forget it and how it made me feel.  My dad was a great father and I owe a lot to him.  But that was something that has stuck with me and has slightly marred my memories of my dad.

Oh and it did NOT make me lose weight!  Once I got off the medication I gradually lost it.  

My 3 Worst Traits

out of order - I am in the last couple days of school and spending most of my time after work putting together the photo/scrap books we make for each child, so not enough time for the topic I was supposed to write about yesterday so I am changing the order of blog topics.

For May 22 - Your Three Worst Traits

1.  Perfectionist - some people have said I am a control freak - but I think it is more of a perfectionist thing.  For example, if someone at school is setting something up and I think I have a better way to do it (no actually I KNOW I have a better way to do it) it really bugs me not to change it.  Or, I love it when someone else wants to vacuum or something at home but then it bothers me if they don't do it as well or as thoroughly as I would.

2. Social Discomfort - I enjoy going to parties or events but I always freak out ahead of time about what I'm going to wear, or how I will look.  Funny because usually I care very little about these things, but they are agony for Christmas parties or weddings. etc.,  and I am very uncomfortable about dancing. I hate this feeling of insecurity.

3. Procrastinator - I do tend to put things off but I work well under pressure although I might get crabby about it.

Favorites From the Past

 A list of links to your favorite posts in your archives


I am assuming this means favorite posts of my own?  I have 2 favoritea from the first blog I started back in 2008, so that is what I am listing here.

"Can I Get a Little Support Here Please?"
http://bridesmom-vicky.blogspot.com/2008_03_01_archive.html

"Bridesmom or Birdsmom?
http://bridesmom-vicky.blogspot.com/2008_07_01_archive.html

These are longer entries but I think they are rather entertaining and reading them really takes me back.

Good boy!

May 20 Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now.

I have been avoiding writing this blog today because I don't want to focus my attention on what I am struggling with - I am afraid too many things might come to mind and it will be depressing!

I constantly struggle with keeping things organized and clean at home, keeping myself healthy and in shape, keeping up with the garden, and staying within our budget, not to mention struggling with the empty nest thing and getting older.
But maybe the most current struggle is that since we added a new dog to the family I am trying to train my husband.  Oh I am working on training the dog of course, but right now he is the one being more stubborn and resistant to training.  It's not all his fault of course, he did not grow up with dogs in his family, and probably never had an interest in training an animal.  I on the other hand nearly always had a dog growing up, plus horses, including a colt I had to train.  I also work with young children - very similar.  The problem as I see it is that John wants Sydney to listen to him. and if she doesn't, he gets louder and angrier with her.  I can't convince him that having her fear him is not the way to get the results we are after.  He also doesn't seem to get the idea of positive reinforcement in the way of praise or treats.  I think he thinks that it is positive enough if he doesn't raise his voice with her.  It didn't help that he did not particularly like the trainer I called to work with when we first got Sydney, but she had already worked with Sydney in the shelter so I thought that would help.  He also wasn't expecting her to be quite such a project; so energetic and mouthy, and curious.  I have to take responsibility for that since I was the one that really choose to get her (but that face, how could I NOT??).

What I want is for John to understand that first he has to develop a rapport with her, so she trusts him, especially considering her history of being abused.  Then I want him to be patient with her, and not forget that he has to act like it is a big deal when she does the right thing - comes when we call, sits for her leash, etc.  Of course she is going to make mistakes but those are best ignored, and quickly move to something she can do and be rewarded for instead of yelling and scaring her.  She learns so quickly when she is rewarded.  No one learns when they are scared.  She might learn to be afraid of him, but that is not going to work.  If I could just convince him . . .

Perhaps I need to listen to myself.  Hmmm.  Maybe I need to think in terms of positive reinforcement for John - "good boy, you didn't yell when Sydney jumped on the sofa,  here's a new golf ball for you!"  or "you were so patient getting Sydney to sit - good boy John, more ______ for you!"  You get the idea.  
Stay tuned.  I'll let you know how it goes!

All in the Family

May 19th - 5 of your favorite blogs and why.

Funny thing is that even as I like to write a blog myself, I do not usually seek out blogs to read.  My favorites would be family blogs so in alphabetical order here they are -

My daughter Caitlin's blog Adventures Down Under at caitlinboreyko.blogspot.com

This blog was more than just interesting reading, it was a connection to my far away daughter.  It was a way for me to have the adventure vicariously through her.  I have wanted to go to Australia since I was 10 years old and the TV show Skippy The Bush Kangaroo was on, but realistically I doubt I will ever get there.  This was as close to a dream as I could get.

My nephew Jakes blogs - he has several but mainly Jake Hikes and Bikes at jakehikesandbikes.blogspot.com - Jake is another adventurer who just gets out and does it, something I have never felt I was good at.  While I don't aspire to do some of the things he writes about, crazy mileage hikes and bikes, I admire that he does it and he writes in a very entertaining style.

My son Jonathan's blog Rooted at jboreyko.blogspot.com
I enjoy reading Jonathan's blog because he tends to present a side of things that I have not thought of, or do not necessarily agree with, and it makes me think. Reading his blog helps me get to know him better, and figure his point of view.  It also helps me feel closer now that I do not see him very often.

My sister also has several blogs that I check from time to time but she keeps changing or adding blogs and taking breaks from them so it makes it difficult to keep up!  I loved her little horse blog but it has been a long time since her last entry at thelittlehorse.blogspot.com.  She also has a blog called Learning As I Go at truckstuck.blogspot.com. I also enjoy her facebook page called The Robin Makes a Laughing Sound, after her book of bird poetry and sketches in journal style.

My daughter in law Shanda's blog Sought After at hesoughtafterme.blogspot.com
I am fascinated to read Shanda's blog because she is the woman who captured my son's elusive heart when he set standards so high we never thought he would find anyone who could meet them!  Shanda is also a very good writer, and she impresses me with her candor and lack of pretense when writing about herself.



Other blogs I check out from time to time are


Defining Your Home, Garden and Travel at definingyourhome by Freda Cameron

Deb's Garden at debsgarden.squarespace.com

And although it doesn't technically appear as a blog, it reads like one - Anne Lamott on facebook
She is such a good writer and interesting person.

My Best Side

May 17 - A favorite photo of yourself
This photo was taken at Kristen's first swim meet on the NH team  (she had already done a couple months on swim team in NC) when she was on the White Mt. Rapids, at a meet in Claremont.  It was a cloudy, cold day,  and she and Sara were huddled up inside some sleeping bags trying to get unchilled after the warm-ups in the cold pool, being whiny and wimpy so put on the cap and googles to try to make them laugh.

I love this photo for two reasons.  First, it evokes some of my favorite memories  - being in NH, how much fun it was to do swim team with my kids and with my friend Susan's kids, and the fun we had traveling (and I mean traveling - often 40 miles or more - ) together to the meets.  I loved being in NH for the summers with my kids.  Even though Jonathan didn't do swim team with the girls he had fun with his friends and they would come over and do crazy things like set up croquet or miniature golf courses that went off the roof, and we all had fun hiking, going to the beach, seeing friends and relatives.
I also love it because I think it really illustrates my fun and goofy side, and I like how happy I look, and besides all that it has lots of my favorite color in it!

It's Not That Bad

May 16 - My "lot in life" and how I am working to overcome it.

This is one entry I am really stuck on.  According to wiki.answers.com "It's a Biblical reference . .  the saying comes from the story in Genesis where Abraham and Lot part ways and Lot, not believing in Abraham's knowledge of God, seeks his own future and is tortured for it. Parts ways with what God has commanded multiple times and throughout his life seeks the wrong path. Therefore, in his life he finds trouble throughout. Many in this day in age who find trouble (perceived or otherwise) in life, claim it is their "Lot" in life that they must endure".

Answers.yahoo claims a different origin for the phrase. "Villages in several parts of the world would periodically redistribute the assigned use of parcels of communally owned agricultural land by drawing lots. When/where lands were owned/controlled by feudal lords, lot use was assigned by them on whatever basis they chose. The type and quality of an allotted parcel, however chosen, as well as the availability of water and other resources, would determine whether it could best be used as orchard, cropland, or pasturage; the amount and type of work necessary to make it yield a living; thus it set an upper limit on the degree to which a family could prosper. As it was very difficult -- in some times and places it was illegal --for villagers to just up and go elsewhere, their lot in life was literally dependent upon their lot."

And Chacha.com  says "Your lot in life -your circumstances,your marriage,your lot in your home,and even your hardships - may not be what you had planned".

The more I think about it the sillier it sounds for me to dwell on my "lot in life".  Everyone has their challenges, I don't think anyone has things turn out the way the planned all the time, and our property is not longer owned/controlled by feudal lords.  I

I would say it is my lot in life to realize how very fortunate I am to have all that I need and beyond - a nice home, great family, good job, etc. and I am working on trying to remember to be grateful for it everyday.  

Dog Whispering (Mostly)

Day 15, Wednesday: A Day in the life (include photos from throughout your typical day - this could be "a photo an hour" if you'd like)

I am not allowed to post photos from my class, but at work today we finished writing and drawing about our favorite parts of school, explored the properties of rocks, painted with feathers, read a "George and Martha" book, played tag, restaurant and sifted pebbles out of the sand on the playground, and had snack, shares, played with big blocks and in our dramatic play centers. 

After work Kristen and I walked the dogs. 

Ate lunch and took a nap with the dogs.

Worked on some sitting/lying calmly with the dogs.

Watered some plants and cleaned the bird baths in the garden.

Ate supper while having the dogs sit quietly, Sydney on her mat.

Played with the dogs over behind the pool.

Sorted the rocks we ordered for panning at school on Friday.

Sorted photos, papers and stickers to make our end of year photo books for school

Worked on this blog, and then made Sydney's kong for tomorrow, set the coffee maker up, and read in bed.

Having technical difficulties loading photos and surprise surprise need to take my dog out. Will try again tomorrow.

These Are A Few of my Favorite Things

May 14 Blog Challenge - 10 things that make me really happy

Especially today -
1. Kristen came home for the summer
2. Beautiful sunny clear dry (NH!) weather
3. Chocolate sea salt brownies from Trader Jo
4. My dog being better behaved than I expected with new dogs around

Other things-
5a. Going out with my husband
5b. Going out/spending time with my friends
6. When my kids come home or I visit them
7.. Being in NH where the purple lilacs grow (see photo curtesy of Caitlin!)
8. Swimming especially in Squam,
9.. Feeling like I just taught a really good lesson
10. Performing well or improving athletically

Sorry

Issue a public apology. This can be as funny or as serious or as creative as you want it to be.


I'm sorry for -

-forgetting where my keys are and getting frustrated y'all won't help me find them

-not keeping the computer cord in a safe place away from the dog

-not being a better cook

-not having longer legs

-not changing the beds every week

-whining about living in NC instead of in NH (but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop!)

-sending too many emails making it hard for you to keep up

-not wearing more fashionable clothes

-not keeping my car as clean as I could

-procrastinating

-wanting to be alone at times when I should be cherishing time spent with family and friends

Did I Miss Anything?

Day 12, Sunday: What do you miss? (a person, a thing, a place, a time of your life...)

I miss a lot of things and I know I have a tendency to dwell on the things from my past that I miss so I am going to go through them right now and then try to stop thinking about them so much and concentrate more on the present.

A person

I miss my dad who died the first fall after we moved here to NC 17 years ago.  My dad really is the one who taught me to swim, patiently waiting for me to overcome my fear of water, and swimming is one of my very favorite things.  From him I learned to be a good packer.  He and I both could fit more into a car than you would believe could possibly fit.  We both love messing about with boats and ropes and being on the water.  We both loved NH, and he is the one who bought the house in Sandwich before I was born.

I also miss my childhood friend Jane who lives far away.  She is the none family member who has known me the longest, since we were both one. I also miss my good NH friends, especially Susan and Jan.  Luckily I do get to see both of them and Jane in NH in the summer.  Maybe sometime they will come visit me here! Here are Susan and me and Jan being silly last summer!

A thing

A thing that I miss is the feeling of being young, strong and and energetic and healthy.  I hate that I get so achy and tired after work.  I hate that my  hands hurt when I try to open something or crochet or write with a pen, I hate that sleep is so elusive and that I have to take pills for high blood pressure.  

And I hate that all these things that I miss are things I will NEVER get back again - 

A place

Everyone who knows me knows I miss NH and is sick of hearing about it! I love the sights of the lakes and mountains and the impossibly starry night sky, I miss the smell, so clean and piney.  I miss how quiet it is there, and I miss the small-town-ness of it, where you bump into people you know wherever you go, and the school receptionist, who actually answers the phone live, recognizes your voice. I miss the winter and full moon light on the snow, and maple syrup making and the incredibly bright and crisp fall days.  I miss just being able to go out and ski, or kayak, or swim in a lake and it is just an everyday event, not a major deal. I could go one but I will spare you.                           

                                                  Squam Lake

The front room or lobby of the red house

A time of your life

Of course I miss the time we were living in NH, but in general I miss the time of being a parent to young children.  Being a mother was the thing I dreamed of most as a child, and was a favorite time of my life.  I loved all of it - the constant attention they needed as babies, the excitement of watching them learn and grow, reading to them, going on trips with them, coaching them through various experiences in their school days, planning and taking part in their activities from swimming lessons, daisy/brownie or cub scouts, teaching their Sunday school classes and teaching them preschool at home with other children, soccer, cross country, track, diving, cheerleading, swim team, band, chorus, I know I am still their mother but I selfishly miss having them be dependent on me, and taking part in almost all of their activities.  The only things I really don't miss about mothering are having them be sick, and teaching them how to drive.

                        Caitlin, me, Gus the dog, Jonathan, John and Kristen

There, I think I have covered all the things that I really miss.  Time to turn my attention to the present - to still having a husband and my mom around, and some daughters who will be returning for some months, good friends around here that I enjoy spending time with, my garden that provides some pretty scenery, an upcoming longer-than-usual summer trip to NH that will involve my children and family - even my husband will come up this year! -  my childhood friend Jane, my NH friends, the beauty of the lakes and mountains, and really good memories of my dad who is the one who brought NH into our family in the first place.

                                  
                                               Sandwich Town Beach in the evening

10 words

May 10  - sell yourself in 10 words

nurturing, patient, resourceful, soft hearted, goofy, young at heart, optomist

It's cool in the pool . . . maybe a little cooler than it should be . . .

May 10 blog challenge - Most embarrassing moment.

I have had what I feel is more than my share of embarrassing moments but have probably blocked the worst of them out.  The one that comes to mind the most quickly happened in high school.  I had finally  gotten contacts and my braces off and was feeling a tad more confident about myself.  I was at a pool party at my friends house, and we were pushing each other in.  Well I tried push in this guy that I had a crush on and as he fell he reached to grab and pull me in but instead grabbed my swimsuit top!  I fell in and surfaced to laughter and someone told me I better fix my suit - I didn't realize my suit top was totally not covering what it was supposed to be covering , , ,  I was so mortified!

She's a maniac! But I love her.

May 9 blog challenge - A moment in your day (this can be just a photo or a photo and words).

Although I don't have a photo that was taken today, I have this photo that I found today.  Or more correctly, that my dog Sydney found.  See the chew marks in the upper right hand corner?  Thanks to Sydney!

But it is a typical moment of my day, when I find something she has chewed.  Like my ipod.  Or my computer power cord, or my sandals, the corner of my quilt, the wicker footstool in the TV room, or my newsletter for school!  Yes, the dog eats my homework.  Just to even it out, here is a picture of her -  

she is sweet and brave and a bundle of energy, and I am grateful that she is part of my day, everyday!

Two for the price of one!

May 8 blog challenge - A piece of advice you have for others - anything at all.

Here is the advice I gave my children and I am eternally grateful that with only a few special exceptions

they followed it.  My advice was/is to be home by midnight.  No it wasn't a curfew.  We didn't do curfews.  If my kids were going out we would discuss when a reasonable time to be home was taking into consideration the next day's plans (soccer tournaments, exams, etc.) and how comfortable John and I were with where they were going, who was driving, etc.  This way instead of just having an external rule applied to all situations (curfew) the kids learned the process of making  responsible decisions. (That is where I just snuck in a second piece of advice on parenting!) I think it worked pretty well. Oh I am sure there a couple things that perhaps they weren't totally straight with me about, but at least nothing bad ever happened, and I stand by both of these pieces of advice.  Empower your children to make good decisions, and nothing good happens after midnight.

EEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKK!!!!!!

May 7 blog challenge topic - The thing(s) you are most afraid of.

I don't usually think of myself as being fearful but this assignment is bringing a whole list of phobias to mind - I am afraid of tornados, (but not of swimming in a thunderstorm). I am afraid of having a stroke, and I am afraid of being audited by the IRS not because of having done anything wrong, but just because they are mean). But none of those can match my 2 biggest fears.

This would be a tie between cockroach/palmetto bugs and being stuck in a car underwater.

Apparently the term "palmetto bug" is a euphemism for the large American cockroaches that populate the south. They are large, winged and unafraid of you.  They think nothing of flying into your face or running across your leg, foot, whatever.  Gross, I feel nauseated just thinking about them.  From May through October I am in fear whenever I open a closet, a kitchen drawar or the dishwasher or even just enter a room or the porch in the evening.  I am not a sissy.  I am not scared of bats, mice or snakes, but let me tell you there is something about a palmetto bug that evokes a gut response in me like nothing else.  I don't know why I have such a fear of them.  When I was young, about 9 or 10 and before I had ever seen one before we drove past a billboard that must have been for an exterminator, and it had a giant picture of a cockroach on it.  I had such a visceral reaction I even got shaky!  I could not get that picture out of my mind for days.  I guess I was born with that fear.

I don't know when I started being afraid of being stuck in a car underwater.  On my drives between NC and NH I have encountered some pretty amazing bridges and some pretty awful weather.  Crossing the Alligator River in high winds, crossing the Nice River in an ice storm, crossing the Woodrow Wilson bridge as it was falling apart right before being rebuilt, and crossing the Tappen Zee bridge pretty much anytime are all pretty scary. But sometime in there I started having this fear of going off the bridge and being stuck underwater.  Maybe it was when they started making cars have power windows.  Will they open underwater??  I tend to doubt it.  This means I would have to be calm enough to wait until enough water is inside my car to be able to open the door.  And to make it worse, now I am imagining driving a car and having a palmetto bug run across my legs making me drive off the bridge!

It might be time for me to get a moped.